America the Stupid: The Great American Religion of Ooga Booga

Here are named some of the leading lights of American governance, all in crucial positions.

James Sensenbrenner, of Wisconsin: Complained about scientific ‘fascism’. Called climate change science an ‘international conspiracy’.

Todd Akin, of Missouri: Speaking of women who have been raped, said, “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.”

Paul Broun, of Georgia: At a church banquet not long ago he said, “All that stuff I was taught about evolution and embryology and the Big Bang Theory, all that is lies straight from the pit of Hell.”

Dana Rohrbacher, of California: Speaking of an ancient period of climate change, said, “We don’t know what those other cycles were caused by in the past. Could be dinosaur flatulence, you know, or who knows?”

Randy Neugebauer, of Texas: Sought to pass a resolution that Americans pray ‘to humbly seek fair weather conditions’. That was his response to violent tornadoes and extensive drought.

These men are all members of the American House of Representatives, duly elected by the people of their home districts, and they are all members of the House Committee on Science, Space, and Technology.

The House Republicans, the people in charge now of the House of Representatives, have appointed to a critical committee dealing with significant issues of the Twenty-First century, in a time of critical need for intelligent, informed, and wide-ranging discussion and action on a number of issues involving science, the Republicans have appointed men from the Stone Age whose greatest ability, aside from getting the ignorant rubes back home to elect them, is to hide in the back of caves mumbling ‘Ooga booga’ while a thunderstorm rages outside.

And just to ice the cake, just to put the cherry on top of the American ice cream sundae, the chairman of the committee, one Ralph Hall, of Texas, has said about climate change, “I’m really more fearful of freezing. And I don’t have any science to prove that. But we have a lot of science that tells us they’re not basing it on real scientific facts.”

This is America, the leader of the free world as the whole world falls down the rabbit hole of massive, global climate heating, on the way to mass extinction, all documented, all researched, all full of facts and intelligence. America, still living in the Stone Age, led by shamans and priests of Ooga Booga.

Remember the names you read here. These are the men your children will curse as they struggle to breathe in a dying world.

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2 Responses

  1. Of course there are two sides to every story. If we hear from the guy who arrives at his conclusions via the scientific method, then we must give equal weight to the opinions of the guy who receives his conclusions through divine revelation. Both sides are always equally valid, and a modern journalist must respect that.

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    • I know you’re being sarcastic. Otherwise I’d have to find you and shoot you with one of those big squirt guns that shoots out holy water.

      (No, I don’t care if my remark makes no sense. This is America. I don’t have to make sense.)

      Like

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