Alabama Sinks Deeper Into The Sea Of Stupid

Alabama Republican State Senator Shadrack McGill is doing his godawful best to make the State of Alabama the dumbest place in America.

His clever two-pronged attack involves using the Bible to justify keeping the pay of teachers low, while using bogus logic absent fact to justify raising his own pay.

The  world stares in silent, stunned wonder at the  brilliance of the American political system that continually fills its legislatures with these great minds of absolute genius.

McGill said that by paying legislators more, they’re less susceptible to taking bribes.

"He needs to make enough that he can say no, in regards to temptation. … Teachers need to make the money that they need to make. There needs to be a balance there. If you double what you’re paying education, you know what’s going to happen? I’ve heard the comment many times, ‘Well, the quality of education’s going to go up.’ That’s never proven to happen, guys.

"It’s a Biblical principle. If you double a teacher’s pay scale, you’ll attract people who aren’t called to teach.

And perhaps at the next prayer breakfast or prayer lunch or prayer dinner Mr. McGill, obviously a product of Alabama’s school system, can explain how raising legislators’ pay makes them less likely to take bribes, since he hasn’t got a set of facts out there to prove that point, but apparently that must be in the Bible too, no doubt somewhere near the verse that says you should impoverish teachers in order to make your kids as stupid as you are, thus reducing intergenerational discord.

Yessiree, bubba, these Southern religious geniuses is just the best and brightest.

Like one of  their own said, ‘You can’t fix stupid.’ The  country needs a border fence alright – right around  the Southern Bible belt states.

Maybe old Abe should have just let the idiots go in 1861.

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[The Lion recognizes that picking on an entire region of the country just because it seems constantly to produce dumbassery is not really fair. But really, they manage to come up with so much of it that it just beggars belief. Of course we have our clowns in the North too, but we just can’t compete on the numbers as well as the utter depth to which the Southern legislators manage to reach when they pull up the gobs of stupidity they use to smear their states. But perhaps it’s not fair to be so hard on the legislators. After all, they usually don’t vote themselves into office, do they? Or is that a Southern custom I missed?]

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4 Responses

  1. Yeah, sorry about that, Melissa… 😦

    Like

  2. Hey, Mister Grumpy! Alabama here. 😀

    Shadrack McGill is a special kinda fucktarded.

    But guess what. I was talking to a Lexus-driving, God-fearing, tennis-and-golf-playing, happily married 69 year old Christian woman today. It was at work. Anyway, this woman (Virginia) is telling a story about being taken out for her birthday by a black girl (Lisa) she made friends with 25 years ago when Lisa was a teenager. Now she’s 40. Virginia met Lisa because the teen called her randomly from an insurance agent ad. Virginia used to be an agent, and Lisa thought Virginia looked friendly and understanding in the ad. So, she just rang Virginia up because she needed another soul to talk to. Lisa had a lot of problems related to parental neglect and a sexual orientation crisis. Virginia has been her friend ever since. Lisa has had the same girlfriend now for 15 years, and she goes out on the birthday lunches, too.

    I always liked Virginia because she usually tells gripping stories. This one made me smile ear to ear. I can just see Virginia driving into the projects for these lunches and the teenagers seeing the Lexus, thinking she must be CIA or something. 😀

    Alabama deserves to be mocked and teased and kicked in the nutsack for the stupid and mean stuff, but it doesn’t all suck. 😉

    Like

    • “but it doesn’t all suck.”

      True. There is WriteChic Press. 😀

      Like

  3. itt does all suck

    Like

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