Legislating Against Stupidity

The Lion often wonders how legislators get picked for the job. The answer may have come in a story in today’s Globe about the Massachusetts Legislature tacking on a budget amendment prohibiting texting while driving:

Similar legislation passed overwhelmingly last year in the House, but key senators argued that they did not want to "legislate against stupidity." Recent events, however, have swayed them.

"A lot of us who opposed this in the past realize that there’s a new generation of drivers who think it’s OK to text while they’re driving," said Senator Steven Baddour, a Methuen Democrat who is chairman of the Legislature’s Joint Committee on Transportation and was one of the leading opponents of previous proposals. "This generation clearly doesn’t get it. It’s not the same as talking on a cellphone. You can’t text safely while driving."

Somehow these geniuses conflate ‘legislating against stupidity’ with legislating against a practice that gets innocent people killed by idiots who text while driving. (And by the way, Senator, talking on a cellphone while driving isn’t safe either.)

Of course these buffoons just couldn’t accept the plainly intelligent argument that if you’re texting you’re not watching the road and you are far more likely to cause an accident and get someone killed. Nope, they had to wait for a couple of train crashes and a bus crash.

So the truth is out. In order to win a seat in a state legislature you have to be the stupidest person in the contest. And then if you’re outstandingly stupid the people of your state will send you to Congress, particularly if you’re a Republican like Senator James Inhofe of Oklahoma or Representative Joe Barton of Texas or the ever clever Georgia Representative Paul Broun who wants… well, here’s what he wants:

“The National Year of the Bible Resolution reminds us that our great nation was founded upon Biblical principles and that religious freedom is guaranteed by the Bill of Rights. I encourage Speaker Nancy Pelosi to bring this resolution to the floor so President Barack Obama has the opportunity to designate an appropriate year as ‘The National Year of the Bible,’” said Paul Broun.

The NYOBR is Broun’s pet resolution.

Umm, Paul, baby, the nation wasn’t founded on Biblical principles, and it wasn’t founded as a Christian nation. And what the hell, how about having a year of the Koran, and the Rig Veda, and the Torah, and some American Indian mumbo-jumbo? The Americans who believe that stuff are Americans. How about a year of Humanist Principles for the millions of atheists and agnostics and freethinkers and humanists? And yes, us evil humanists and atheists are Americans too.

Not a chance, of course. The Paul Brouns of the world are profoundly offended that beliefs other than their own narrow little fairy tales exist.

The Lion heard an interview with this guy yesterday, and yes, he is even stupider than his Bible Year resolution makes him out to be. That’s not to say that Republicans have a monopoly on stupidity, but they’re doing their best these days to lock up the franchise.

One thing is certain. Legislators on any level will never legislate against stupidity. They’d put themselves out of their jobs, and miss out on all the perks and corruption they’ve come to love so well.

Technorati Tags: Massachusetts Legislature, Texting, Driving, Bible, James Inhofe, Joe Barton, Paul Broun, Congress, Politics, Religion, Christianity, Atheist, Agnostic, Humanist, Freethinker