The Mitten Wins Michigan Primary, Proving Once Again Republican Hypocrisy

Michigan Republicans gave Willard ‘The Mitten’ Romney a vote of confidence yesterday by giving him 39% of the vote in their primary.

Apparently they liked his message that when he oozes into the Oval Office he’ll pay more attention to them than to anything else in the country.

He promised a so-called partnership between government and industry that will make Michigan number one in the car business again. A ‘workout’, not a bailout, said The Mitten.

The Mitten has a predilection… no… he has a finely crafted plan for the primaries, a plan calling for him to say whatever the voters in any given area want to hear. Thus, his Michigan stance. Certainly not wide, but as narrowly tailored as the man’s mind.

Apparently he and his handlers forgot that the rest of the country has access to every word that sleazes out of his mouth. The Lion suggests that, if Michigan is so important that it will be preeminent among the concerns of The Mitten’s presidency, then perhaps Willard should run for governor of Michigan and spare the rest of us a corporatist presidency.

But about the hypocrisy part of the headline… Michiganers got screwed by greedy and incompetent corporations, and in keeping with the Republican mantra of small government and personal responsibility, they now whine, by voting for Romney’s ascendancy, that the government should make everything right and bring back the 50s.

And The Mitten’s promise of a government-industry partnership? All that means is that corporations will get handouts from the Feds (that means tax dollars from the rest of country) and that workers will get screwed. That’s a promise. That’s what Republicans do. They take care of their rich friends, and working people are not the ones they invite to fancy dinners at The Mitten’s mansions or the palaces of CEOs.


8 Responses

  1. Thanks for this. Right On.


  2. I wasn’t surprised by the result. Disappointed, yes; surprised, no.


  3. Mitten’s a loser. If he thinks the rest of the country is going to care about him, he’s going to be surprised. He won in MI because, unfortunately, name recognition is probably the single biggest factor in voter choice.

    Sad but true.


  4. Mitt’s promises are essentially stolen from Herbert Hoover’s:
    “A chicken in every pot. And a car in every backyard, to boot.”

    The problem then was: the chicken was disease-ridden, the pot was cracked, the car had no engine, and the backyard belonged to a big corporation. Only the boot worked, and that was firmly up the citizens’ asses.


  5. If you had a lot of pots did you get a lot of chickens?


  6. Spanqi –

    I’m so surprised to see you here. I would have thought that all this white background would hurt your eyes, coming from that dark space of yours. Are you sure you’re alright? I wouldn’t want to be responsible for you getting hurt here by all this brightness.



  7. One word – sun glasses.

    Wait! Two words…


  8. Spanqi –

    See, it’s not just your eyes that are affected, but your mind, your verbal and cognitive skills are obviously suffering. Come forth from darkness, Spanqi, come into the light! May the farce be with you!


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